Naughty Neena:)

Yesterday I went with Amanda to Calgary for Wicca's third appointment with Dr. Duvall.  This is my second trip, and it's been good experience for me...unfortunately at Woo's expense...but I do enjoy seeing a different aspect of veterinary medicine.  It blows my mind how much there is to learn...in a I can't wait to get started way!

On the way home we stopped at Louanne's for a herding lesson...this is Brit looking like a real border collie:).

She's a big girl...already working on her 'walk-ups'...

THIS...is Neena on sheep...

And this...

AND this...(please do note the crazy flying ears lol)

She's being a very, very naughty border collie...

And how did I feel about that?

I thought it was freaking hilarious.  I'm probably a bad mom.

BUT...here's the thing...it had been 2 1/2 years since the last time Neena was at Louanne's.  Back then, she was still a baby dog, and we struggled with confidence (big suprise huh!)...in fact, I had a hard time keeping her with me, if I put too much pressure on her she'd try to leave the pen.  Her dog equivalent of F-you.

So  I just can't lie...it made me laugh to see my scared-of-life border collie grip & chase.  And my giggles might have encouraged her to be naughtier.  Its a vicious circle.  Of giggling and naughtier.  How bad can that really be?

I wish I had the time and resources to pursue herding more seriously, it is truly a cool experience to see the natural ability & instinct your dog has...occasionally Neena even looks a little bit like a real border collie lol... 

Jenny Glen explained the instinct to Amanda as a type of 'deja vu' for the dogs...which is a cool way to think about it.

And while I can see it, I loved feeling how Neena responds to the pressure I put on her...

But for now its something we can play around with occasionally, although I'm not sure Neena's ok with that...she really wasn't ready to be done lol.

Thanks for the photo's Amanda!

On another note...Louanne is training Mack Daddy full time, he's a big boy working dog now and will make his trialing debut sometime in 2012.   

 It was awesome to see him, even if it was short...we miss our Mack Daddy:)!

Trial Update

Last week was a bit of agility over load after a month off where I'll admit we did nothing…no agility…at all. I've felt guilty about that for sure. Besides the guilt, I was extra ready to get back at it last week...I’ve missed my friends, the challenges, the working towards goals, the play time, the bloody knuckles, the banter…everything. And I'm pretty sure she did too:). Class was good, we had a few sniffy or worried moments but we worked through them and for the most part she was happy, motivated and focused. And later I realized she didn't go AWOL once...not that she does it all the time, and sometimes the zoomies can be kind of cute, but they aren’t safe, and they are an indication
of a weakness in our relationship. It was a great little realization!

Thursday night we ran a jumpers course in league, she had a minor meltdown our first run, and blew me off the second run. It’s a hard line with her between being happy, cheering her on, and playing WITH HER and being firm, trusting her to do her job and demanding she plays WITH ME. I'm learning. After we stuck around and did some focus work in the arena and around the benching area and by the end of the night I felt better about our evening.

Friday Neena and I headed to Calgary for the CAA trial at the Fezdome and I have to say we had a pretty awesome weekend:).

I wasn’t really sure what to expect. I know how hard we've worked, and I've seen her handle scary situations so much better than she has in the past. But it was still hard to know how to prepare myself emotionally for Neena. And I'm not 100% right now either...the last thing we needed was simultaneous Crazy Pants AND Crazy J meltdowns.

Fortunately neither of us had did...and believe me we both had plenty of opportunities too! But we dealt...and while I won't say we were our best, we were SO FAR from our worst:).

After the weekend I really wanted to re-read the "Reminders to Jen" post...that weekend was my game changing moment and I wanted to see if I've followed through on those goals, and if/how they've made a difference. Here are my thoughts:

Trust. I need to work on our relationship so she will trust me and stick with me on the course.
Neena walked with me to every startline...and there were runs I know she was nervous at the start line, but we got in that ring and we ran.  Additionally, there was 'several times when she thought about running off course...but a firm "Neena" was all it took and she chose to come back.  Every time.  I'd tell you how good that felt...but I can't.

Motivation & rewards (aka. Build Drive!!!)...I need to get better at varying rewards, and teach her that even if there isn't a visible reward on course she will get one at the end. Better yet if I can become the reward.  The length of time we can use toys as rewards in class has definitely increased, however she would barely play with me in the arena this weekend. We played outside, and she was happy to focus/work with me for food...sometimes for longer periods of time than I would typically ever work her in class (my timing to the start line sometimes still sucks lol). But we still have some work to do here...I want her to play with me to the startline. Although if her options are to either focus on me/the food reward or meltdown...we are making progress. Suggestion from Sarah was a goodie containers, which she also wasn't interested in, but I will start building their value in class/at home and hopefully they can be part of the transition from treats to play at a trial in the future.

Building focus. This is tied in with many of these points, but if I understand this right the more focused she is on me, the less she will focus on the 'scary' stuff...writing this here makes that seem so elementary. But sometimes I need to remind myself of the basics!!!  NO DOUBT IN MY MIND that doing this was key to helping Neena deal with her fears/stress this weekend.  Again, I just think about those startlines.  And she's avoiding me so many times on course in the past...one of my best moments from the entire weekend was her looking up at me from the table.  It was her relaxed, trusting, happy face...made me all melty inside and stuff.  That moment alone validated all the work we've done. 

Continue to build our warm-up/cool-down routine.  Check.  Right down to a bedtime massage last night which had the added bonding time benefit:).  But still always a work in progress.

Training. Class once a week and our regular 'work' is not cutting it any longer.  During the summer we had class once a week, and most weeks we made it to the field at least once more.  Like I said, recently I've been slacking here...no excuses.

Find a better balance between making agility fun and being firm, reinforcing this is a job that she is expected to do.  I repeat...I'm learning...slowly.  Lol.

~

Final notes...although her confidence and ability to recover is MUCH better, I still think we would have had more problems at the Balzac arena, turns out I'm wait listed for the December trial and I'm not sure I'm all that upset about that.   I need to have her head every minute so our distance (eg. in gambles) is almost non-existant.  And she was more worried about the judges than she has been in the past.  However, we are doing the right things to help her build the confidence she needs to work through these issues...its just a matter of time and work.

OH YA...AAAAND Neena curled up against my leg Saturday night and went to sleep. Voluntarily. Yep.

Neena...have I told you lately I heart you and your my bestest gal? xo

Thankful

I know I'm a few days late, and this is a lame addition for just how much I have to be thankful for lately...but I can't celebrate Thanksgiving without adding!

#318 - 337 of a Thousand, Endless Gifts

~wide open spaces 

~ escaping the city

~ fresh air

~ harvest

~ smoked beef loin

~ G'nite's and Good MORNINGS!!! lol

~ a boy toy for the daughter

~ HELMETS

~ motorsports

~ No-No and Auntie NEN

~ boys that never grow up

~ confidence

~ Crazy Eyes 

~ Saturday mornings, a good book and breakfast in bed

~ third author!

~ cowboys & rain & early mornings

~ that Neena gets shotgun

~ dinosaurs and piano keys

~ lunch dates & baby snuggles 

~ CAKE

Published!!!

Remember this?

March 8, 2011

Monday - a door opens, stay tuned...I'm keeping it a suprise (its killing me!) but its BIG! Almost as big as my vet interview...*claps hands in glee*...can't wait, can't wait, can't WAIT!!

It was finally published in the Journal of Food Protection this month...

This is definitely one of my Top 5 research technician moments:).

Just a little naughty...

Amanda recorded one of our standard runs at the Go! Dog! Go! trial a couple weekends ago...this video makes me happy in my heart...Neena was totally being naughty, but she's just so happy.  And even though she does some 'free-styling'...she's not worried, she's not shutting down, and we are still playing together...

 In a nutshell that was our whole weekend...I was so proud of her, and of myself...we've worked hard this summer and I know we may slip again in the future...fear and confidence are funny that way...but now I know we can work through it.

And that is a lesson more valuable to me than any Q :).

Introducing...

Loco the kitty...he belongs to my roomie Jacinda, man I forgot how much darn fun kittens are:)!  I was a little worried how Neena would handle small, random and fast...but she's done great.  And Loco has no fear at all...he's a pretty cool lil dude.  Hopefully I can catch some photo's of the two hooligans up to mischief soon!

#301 -  317 of a Thousand, Endless Gifts
~ being the big sister
~ forgiveness
~ after market exhausts and underpasses
~ dancing with the flower girls...
~ lil tuxes & black eyes
~ a little quiet time with Jaxon
~ nipple nibbles...Neena style lol
~ a fun steeplechase debut
~ an unfortunate shredding death for one said cow toy
~ a mauling...Brit style
~ Go! Dog! Go!
~ a savior circle
~ making it to the closing in Snooker without being tweeted off lol
~ a row of Ariats
~ Bonnie
~ spontaneous birthday celebrations
~ cat-calling my favorite hockey player

Believe

I believe that I could

win or lose,

that I could fall, or rise,

at any given moment.

I believe the only way I fail, is if I don't try.

Jodi Hills ~ Believe

Somedays I read this book before I even get out of bed...and believe it or not it helps:)!

Neena and I have an agility trial this weekend...I will not doubt.  I know what's in my heart. 

I believe in us.

p.s.  thanks for the reminder.

Wasting my time?

What's on my mind? A month from today I'll be back at the U of L...

Was I surprised that U of C didn't think of me as their #1 pick for the class of 2015? Nope. Did that make it any easier? Not really.

I'm happy to say I don't remember crying, well maybe my eyes watered a little when Dustin left me a voice message telling me he was proud of me anyways. But come on...I'm not a freakin ice cube.

Wasn't anything I could do about it...so I decided to enjoy my summer and worry later. And man have I ever done a good job of that:).

But the truth is it feels like my life is on hold. I'm frustrated. I'm dejected. And worst of all I struggle with self-doubt. Life Truth #813...doesn't matter how many other people believe in you if you don't believe in yourself. I'm working at it.

FYI...I'm not all Debbie Downer...I'm just being honest. I'm getting good at putting on my big girl panties and reminding myself this is not a waste of my time...this chapter of my life does have a purpose. Logically...this is at least part of why I didn't get into vet school...after all the U of C wants to know how bad I want to become Jenilee Peters DVM. What exactly am I willing to do...go through...sacrifice...to get there?

AAAAAND...I'm done talking about it for now.

I'm behind...but here's a few that stick out from the past month.

#266 - 300 of a Thousand, Endless Gifts

~ 35 MPG

~ financial wiggle room

~ pizza on a stick

~ fireworks

~ animal behavior...and that I have a few pals who love to analyze it with me!

~ rodeo's

~ an introduction to working horse competitions!!!

~ real time text messages...

~ party rock anthems

~ being there for Michelle & Sherry's birthdays

~ road trip and old CD's

~ a Facebook wall chat about drugs and hoooookers lololol

~ freshly cut hair

~ seeing hard work pay off...and a demonstration for Windy City Canine Rescue

~ a JD birthday present for my 4 year old...make fun of me all you want!

~ two of my favorite boys

~ being included in family day

~ F18's and Snowbirds

~ dirt on my face at the chuckwagons

~ pride...she's the boss!

~ free choice

~ grace

~ being a rebel...you more so than me;)

~ a sibling road trip...and a little revenge both ways lol

~ 'buttercup' & butter ripple schnapps

~ friends & a modified race

~ Tab's banana bread

~ Sunday's with the family

~ learning something new

~ busy at Alberta Agriculture

~ kittens

~ lily's

~ Katie & Dustin & Wranglers lol

~ a good nights sleep

~ bedtime stories

For Sherry

 It's your birthday blog! I know...a little late...but better than never right?

I had me a little moment Saturday night...we were in your yard, watching your kids playing, at your 30th birthday party. Wow! Seems like just yesterday we were getting our drivers licence's and carpooling to school...when you stop and look back at all the years since then...and where we are right now...kinda blows your mind doesn't it:)?

Anywho...I love my trips to Lloydminster! Its so nice to relax and hang with you and the boys...and sometimes its just easier to chat face to face, even when that means there is no hiding lol. And it was a fun party even if it was cut short...think I'll just let the pictures tell their own lil story.

Ok I lied...I just can't not comment on some of these...is it just me, or does this look...a little...funny...lolol!

Pretty!!!



 At least it can't be said you didn't have a 30th birthday shot;)!

I need one of these...

Wish I hadn't backlit this photo...its so funny, like a lil Kanye West, makes me laugh every time!

Dylan & Auntie Jen's first photoshoot...there's more...but I'm being shy lol.

AND...I was having technical difficulties so here's a link to the 'theme song' lol.

Look out 40!

#244 - 265

#244 - 265  of a Thousand, Endless Gifts
~ meeting a sweetheart, who was abandoned and starved...
~ knowing she will never suffer like that again
~ puttering around my yard...on my land...itty bitty piece that it is!
~ Neena outsmarting the sprinkler
~ a physically (if not always emotionally, she IS mine ya know...) healthy Crazy Pants
~ having fun at agility...even if it was with the distractions lol
~ learning to recover...hmpf....
~ light bulb moments
~ "I love you Auntie Jen"
~ planning for my future
~ quiet time
~ unplanned visits with the Aunties
~ confidence
~ being part of a team
~ watersports
~ childhood friends
~ volleyball
~ giggling and shrieking with Jo Jo
~ friends and family who spoil Crazy Pants
~ a much happier Neena at the race track
~ cruisin' in Mom's new wheels
~ giggling 40 & 50 year olds lol

Training Update

Well...Wednesday was a rough day for Neena and I. I still haven't learned that I can't train or work with her unless I'm 110%...and I sure wasn't. It showed.

Yesterday and today we were back at it...and we had a great time. We've been spending a lot of time working on improving our focus and relationship...one of the greatest feelings in the world is having her look at ME with her silly little smile as we walk by a gophur hole:). I am super excited to start the next set of classes...Sarah's calling it the LMFAO (Learning+Motivation+Fun+Agility Obstacles) class:). I've been assured it will be hard, but its exactly what we need right now!!!

Haven't posted this photograph yet, Wendy (Paws on the Run Photography) took this at the Medicine Hat trial just seconds before she got mauled by Neena...its a great shot, you can see the recognition dawning on her face:).

#224 - 236 of a Thousand, Endless Gifts

~ Neena's snores

~ TWO!!!

~ cupcakes!!!

~ "come get me Auntie"

~ that I worked with her long enough to become friends...the real kind...

~ clay on my ropers

~ a chat on my front bumper

~ laughing at the three E's...exhausted, emotional & Eminem

~ "I win!"

~ new jobs

~ a tipsy Barbie

~ Father's Day brunch

~  Neena and the magpie's

For those of you waiting too...

Dear Applicant:

Thank you for applying to the Doctor of Veterinary Medicine program at the University of Calgary Faculty of Veterinary Medicine. I regret to inform you that you have not been selected for admission into the DVM program starting in September of 2011.

Information about the results of your application will be provided by email in early July and at that time information about the 2010-2011 application process will be posted on the UCVM website (http://vet.ucalgary.ca/dvmprogram).

Yours sincerely,

Alastair Cribb, DVM PhD
Dean, Faculty of Veterinary Medicine
University of Calgary

The Penguins

Neena and I were very happy to have Brit for a few days while Amanda was at regionals with Wicca & Pixel.  She is such a pretty gal, I love her face...and she's so very soft...

This was Brit's second visit, and she was definitely  more comfortable this time...the girls had a great time playing together, even if 5:30am was a tad early for WWF;).

Thankfully that was only one morning...in addition to wrestle mania, they played "we run fast"...

...and "hide & seek".

And when we were finally tuckered...we played a little "Top Models".

Saturday we also played "agility dogs"...Neena's 'Up' trick has turned out to be one of her favorites, we do it a lot when she's nervous, it seems like the movement helps her release her stress.  It's a gooder.

We had such a GREAT training session on Saturday, we still struggle with focus...those darn gophurs are pretty sexy...but I'm seeing improvements already.  I was thrilled with Neena...taking turns with Brit might have had a small part in that:).  Nothing like a little jealousy to make working for me a little more exciting lol!

#209 - 223 of a Thousand, Endless Gifts

~ peanut butter and chocolate cake

~ spoiling a friend

~ progress

~ watching "I run fast"

~ hands stained from playing in the dirt

~ patience

~ the knowledge to do some of the right things

~ age spots

~ a laughing Brady

~ its the ugly truth...that it wasn't my brother

~ a Mom who can handle all my secrets

~ happily tired penguins

~ the giggle of my best friend's child

~ "night night sweet dreams"

~ trust

Reminders to Jen

I don't know how to write this blog.  In fact I'm to the point where I've considered not writing it at all...but doing that would be for the wrong reasons.  This blog has always been about recording our journey, the good, the bad, and sometimes even the ugly:)...I need a record, a reminder of the weekend, for both my and Neena's benefit. 

One of my fears writing this is that it would come across wrong.  I'm still trying to wrap my brain around everything and I'm afraid to be misunderstood.  Mostly because its important to me that I don't come across as too hard on my self or even worse hard on Neena.  I just want to be fair and honest.  I believe that's how you learn and grow.

On to the main event...Neena and I headed to Medicine Hat for the Flashing Canine's Trial last weekend.  I was so excited for it, we've had a lot of fun at outdoor trials in the past and I was really looking forward to having some fun at a trial with her.  Looking back now, I think I was also hoping we'd have similar success to our other outdoor trials.  Maybe not as awesome as our Go Dog Go trial last August, but similar.  And I think going with that attitude was maybe a little naive.  But I'm being honest here.

Was it as hard emotionally as some of our indoor trials have been...not even close.  But this is maybe the best way I can explain it...Amanda taped two of our runs.  One she's already deleted and for the time being she is refusing to show me the other.  And that's ok with me.  Right now the only video I want to watch of Neena and I is our jumpers run from the GDG trial.  Together we had fun.  Together we were a team.

The reality of last weekend is that somehow I let us drift away from that, and while I could come up with lots of excuses I think that's lame.  Bottom line is, Neena isn't an easy girl...but if I want to be serious about agility with her I have to step up my A-game. 
Back to the trial, there are lots of positives from the weekend, a few that stick out in my mind:

• I was able to warm her up before each run by myself (re. without Sarah and/or Amanda's help) and have some level of connection with her at the startline.
• We had more success on course than we have at the past several trials.
• She weaved 12 poles TWICE on course...first time we've done that!  
• She stuck some of her contacts, which means to me she WAS connected at least at some level to me.  On a side note...she had a super cute moment when she blew her contact and reached back with her feet to find it.  She does it at class occasionally too...its super funny...I really should videotape that lol.
• Definitely see some improvements on her recovery after scary things...there was SO much going on this weekend: thunder, baseball, diesel trucks, dogs barking in kennels...and while she was visibly worried, she worked through it.  Not once did I see her shaking on the ground.  Yay for Neena!!!
• She came back.

On the other hand, we definitely have some work to do: 

• Trust.  I need to work on our relationship so she will trust me and stick with me on the course.
• Motivation & rewards (aka. Build Drive!!!)...I need to get better at varying rewards, and teach her that even if there isn't a visible reward on course she will get one at the end.  Better yet if I can become the reward:).  Yep...still trying to wrap my little brain around how I manage that...lol
• Building focus.  This is ties in with many of these points, but if I understand this right the more focused she is on me, the less she will focus on the 'scary' stuff...writing this here makes that seem so elementary.  But sometimes I need to remind myself of the basics!!!
• Continue to build our warm-up/cool-down routine.
• Training.  Class once a week and our regular 'work' is not cutting it any longer.  Sarah and Amanda both talked to me about increasing the amount of training I am doing, my current amount just isn't cutting it.  Its my choice.  If I want her to succeed its what I need to do.  It was still hard to hear, although its the truth and I'm very glad to have people around me who tell me the truth...not just what I want to hear.
• Find a better balance between making agility fun and being firm, reinforcing this is a job that she is expected to do.

I have pages of notes from the weekend, from conversations I've had, and from class this week.  This blog feels like its kind of a 'scratching the surface' type deal...but that's ok.  I think there's enough here it will be a good reminder for me.

On another note...as always it was GREAT hanging with some of my favorite peoples and their dogs!  I really do enjoy cheering on my Go Dog Go pals...and when I started thinking back to the weekend I could pick out a cool moment from at least one of everyones runs.  We have a big group of some really talented trainers and dog/handler teams...I'm pretty proud to be part of it! 

Track Bible's

Race season at Bridge County Raceway kicked off last night! 

Kathy and I had chatted as we prepared for the season, I knew that my position was changing a little this year...but I wasn't expecting to get my very own track bible...it was a moment for me:).

Let me tell you it got well used last night!  All did not go quite how I wanted, but even with the bloody wind and my lame-o driver's meeting, I thought the night was an overall success:).  I'm excited about this summer...its shaping up to be a fun one!

And I'm pretty sure Katie agree's...

#169 - 187 of a Thousand, Endless Gifts

~ ice cream

~ mutual back scratching

~ quality time

~ road trips

~ silky stuff

~ dirt tracks

~ the smell of freshly mowed grass

~ a pouty Neena-ba-Neena

~ a friend who understood when I said I needed my Crazy Pants:)

~ my racing family

~ qt text messages

~ an Oma who talks about her 'racer' great granddaughter

~ a bear-hug...Uncle Frank style

~ a late night chat...Aunt Velma style

~ teasing...the fun kind

~ the ocean

~ my sunflower

~ duct tape and Big Wayne

~ NO HOMEWORK!!!

My Bestest Gal

I find it kind of amusing, and slightly alarming, how much I miss my bestest gal when I'm away.  I especially find the mornings hard...Neena 'snuggles' start my day off right and I struggle without her to focus me.  So it rocked my world when I was suprised with some fantastic photo's half way through my trip...thanks so much Amanda...you really captured Crazy Pants in all her glory:).

Proud!

I have barely talked to Michelle in almost a month...I miss her.  A lot. 

She did email me this link yesterday...I think she's worked hard on this and many of the photograph's used are hers.  I am so very proud of her.  She's an incredibly smart, talented, beautiful ambitious girl.

Another week of gifts

#140 - 156 of a Thousand, Endless Gifts

~ creative photography

~ that he rests his hand on my knee

~ an empty nest

~ the quiet

~ countdowns

~ choosing to work in peace

~ focus

~ a suprise attack hug Colton style

~ words that speak to my heart

~ Neena's smiles

~ lightbulb moments

~ 90's dance music

~ spring

~ playing chicken

~ the smell of fresh flowers

~ a blushing Warren

~ chocolate

A suprise!

Flowers for the right reasons from the right person made my day today!  They smell fabulous, and made studying just a little more bearable...Neena and I have a special thank-you in mind, you're gonna LOVE IT!!!!

Heavy Things

Understanding that heavy things can't fly,

she let go of what was weighing on her heart,

the things she could no more control than carry,

and she gave herself a chance,

a chance to reach into the unassuming blue,

to embrace the possibility of an open sky,

with an open heart.

She gave herself a chance to soar.

-Jodi Hills, An Imperfect Life

~

I'm going to buy this book.  Just as soon as I get a minute.

145

145 cue cards that is...just for my bio lab exam last week.  One down, three to go.

On another note...Neena and I participated in the dog demo at the Children's Festival on Saturday, Amanda put together a video montage of some of the events...if you watch close you'll catch us 'freestyling' our introductory loop.  I was SO HAPPY with her...it was really scary, and she was pretty worried in the beginning.  But once we got in the ring she managed to work through most of her fear, I still lost her a little when we were running...but I was thrilled with her focus on me while we waited for our turn.  Man what a great feeling to see I'm doing the right things to help her, and that some of our work is paying off.